Monday, June 9, 2008

Are 'potty chairs' supposed to say "TRY ME!"?

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Sunday, June 8, 2008

A Question to Father's of Girls

Just the other day, I was out with my 19 month old daughter.
I figured we would go and get a bite to eat somewhere.
Then I realized that I had to use the restroom.

What do you do with your child (male or female) when nature calls?

I can't leave her in the car and run into a gas station.
I can't leave her in her highchair at the restaurant table.

Do I bring her in with me?
Am I really expected to set my daughter down on a public restroom floor and have her wait?
She'll end up getting into something while my back is turned to her, won't she?

Do I leave her in the middle of the room while I use a urinal?
Do I bring her into a stall with me?

What is the proper procedure for this situation?

I'm serious here. This is the first time it's come up, but I'm sure it won't be the last, and I'd really like to know what to do.

Please comment.

(Oh, and sorry about bringing up restrooms again, I normally don't talk about them *this* much...)

Are You My Klingon Mother?

This is the latest (final?) draft of my Klingon translation of "Are You My Mother?"
I used the boardbook version of the text, and the numbers corospond to the pages in that version.
Due to copyright rules, I have not included the English version.
For those of you unfamiliar with Klingon, the carrots "< >" are used in place of quotation marks " "" " to avoid confusion with the glottal stop " ' ". The astriks " * " marks a non-Klingon word.


(1)QImDajDaq ba' bo'Degh.
Sup QIm.

(2)jatlh bo'Degh:
<ghuvaD Soj vISuqnIS!>
vaj mej.

(3) QImDaqDaq Sup QIm.
'ej Sup
'ej Sup.
vaj pel'aQ vIghor ghu.

(4) jatlh:
<nuqDaq ghaH SoSwI''e'?>

(5)QImDaq mej.

(6)puvlaHbe' ghu.
'ach yItlaH.
<DaH SoSwI' vISam!>

(7)vIghro' tlhob ghu:
<SoSwI' SoH'a'?>
neH legh vIghro'.

(8) 'uSgheb tlhob ghu:
<SoSwI' SoH'a'?>
jang 'uSgheb:

(9)targh tlhob ghu:
<SoSwI' SoH'a'?>
jang targh:
<SoSlI' jIHbe'. targh jIH.>

(10)tangqa' tlhob ghu:
<SoSwI' SoH'a'?>
jang tangqa':
<SoSlI' jIHlaHbe'. tangqa' jIH.>

(11)mevmeH Qub.
SoSDaj chaHbe' vIghro' 'uSgheb je.

(12)SoSDaj chaHbe' targh tangqa' je.
jatlh ghu:
<SoS vIghaj.

(13)tIn Doch legh ghu.
jatlh ghu:
<SoSwI' SoHqu'bej!>

(14)jatlh tIn Doch:

(15)jach ghu:
<toH! SoSwI' SoHbe'.
*Snort SoH!>
ghu woH *Snort.

(18) vaj, qaS vay'.
SorDaq ghu tatlh *Snort.
juHDaq ghaH ghu!

(19) vaj chegh SoS.
jatlh ghu:
<SoH vISov.

(20)vIghro' 'uSgheb targh ghap SoHbe'.
tangqa' *Snort ghap SoHbe'.
bo'Degh SoH.
'ej SoSwI' SoH.>

DIvI' Hol © 1960 P. D. Eastman
tlhIngan Hol © 2008 naHQun

My Son

Don't freak out that you didn't know I have a son!
He hasn't been born yet.
He's due October 25th.

My wife has been wondering if she's pregnant for *a while* now, and so when the home test finally *did* show positive, it didn't have that big of an impact.

But on Tuesday, we went in for her first ultrasound, and I got to see the baby growing inside her.
And it was just *so* wonderful.
And then we were told that we were having a boy, and it was just oh so overwhelming.

I am just so excited now that we're having another baby, it's "real".

I've known that my wife is pregnant for a while, it's obvious. But nothing beats seeing your baby on that monitor.
Well, nothing until you can actually hold them in your arms, but that post will come in late October.

And while I'm talking about babies, I compiled the following list of friends/family and their due dates:

sister-in-law: 9/?
friend-in-law: 10/19
wife: 10/25
best friend's wife (well he's not pregnant!): 11/27
sister-in-law 12/?
sister 12/24


I realize it's an odd topic to start a blog with, but it's been on my mind.

So I realize that when one uses the facilities, that your hands become soiled, and therefore need to be cleansed. I'm not disputing this. What I have a problem with, is the way in which we do it.

I've been trained how to wash my hands by grocery stores and restaurants, and while they tell me to use very hot water and hand sanitizer, I still feel that there is room for improvement.

This is the way I see the typical restroom visit happening:

You have finished doing what you do, and are sitting on a toilet.
Your hands are officially dirty and must be cleaned before returning to work, it's the law.

You take your dirty hands, and you touch your pants, shirt, and underclothes all in an attempt to be dressed and modest before leaving the stall.

If tucking in your shirt, your hands go all over the place, tucking and pulling.
It's even possible that you toss your hair.
You then grab your coat or purse and leave the stall.

Wait a minute! You haven't even left the stall yet, and you've already contaminated your clothes and personal belongings! Even if you scrub your hands raw, once you touch your pants, you're dirty again!

Are you not? If touching your clothes right after using the restroom doesn't soil them, what does?
And if it doesn't, how does it soil anything else?

Just my thoughts...